Wednesday, Aug 1, 2012, was truly a great day for fat, clueless, fast-food-eating, gays because they lined up at Chick-Fil-A , a company TheDamienZone never even heard of, to stuff their big gay faces with shitty chicken — actually that’s not really what happened at all.
Of course there were a lot of gays there who simply wanted to eat, but for the most part, the chicken restaurant, which again I swear we never heard of, is run by a guy named Cathy who is opposed to gay marriage, and in a show of support, the folks who agree with the company’s anti-gay marriage policy showed up in droves and gave the company its biggest sales day in their history.
Actually, it’s not even the company that is opposed to gay marriage — it’s the President and CEO of the company who is against gay marriage.
Why would a greasy chicken fast food place even care about gay marriage? The happier a couple is, the more likely they are to eat at fast food restaurants and get fat and disgusting. I swear, sometimes I just don’t understand people — I just don’t. Let them get married and let them stuff their fat happy gay faces for chrissakes!
So the CEO of the company who came out against gay marriage is a guy named Dan Cathy, Now let me ask you something, if your name was Dan Cathy, would you have the nerve to talk out against gay marriage? It’s pretty funny that a guy with the gayest name in history doesn’t like to dish out a wing or a breast or a piece of corn to gay people.
Actually Cathy — and I will always call him Cathy — had this to say last week, and suddenly the restaurant nobody ever heard of was in an uproar.
Chick-fil-A is “very much supportive of the family,” Dan Cathy, president of the popular fast-food chain, said in an interview with Baptist Press. That is, “the biblical definition of the family unit,” he said.
Okay, so that’s Cathy’s opinion and goodie goodie for him and his Chick-Fil-A restaurants. May they have everlasting tranquility in heaven or wherever.
It seems that these previously unheard of restaurants — despite the fact that there are over 1600 of them — drew the overnight wrath of gay people throughout the nation — but “the gays” made a mistake by protesting Cathy’s policy. As usual they had to put up a stink instead of showing dignity and stoicism — I give up trying to teach gay people how to behave. I gave up on the straights twenty years ago — but there are sooooo many more of them and I can’t go around changing the world.
Chick-Fil-A is Atlanta based. A lot of their restaurants are in the deep south and can be found all the way up into good old Washington DC. What do “the gays” expect? This reminds me of how the “the gays” of ultra liberal California could not believe that the black and latino vote that votes about 99% Democrat in that state, voted against gay marriage in droves. Sometimes —- sometimes, Dolores, you have to be a high riding bitch to survive!
What did “the gays” expect would happen if they went all Mary-Militant against this southern fried, biscuits and sausage gravy-makin’ outfit? Sometimes special interest groups are really stupid — this time it looks like “the gays” are going to take stupid to new heights — they do that a lot.
Here’s the deal in a nutshell: Dan Cathy — again, I like to call him Cathy — is the president and CEO , and I guess he’s also the owner of Chick-Fil-A. He is opposed to gay marriage. So he makes a public statement about that and all hell breaks loose.
The media instantly paints Cathy as big bigot and Christian lunatic -and “the gays” are in an uproar — but not the gays who can’t resist the succulent 5-piece meal with 2 side orders and a ultra-sized Coke. Also, “the gays” don’t realize that Jews and Muslims are opposed to gay marriage too — but the heat is always put on some hick Christian. It’s really fucking annoying.
As usual, “the gays” go apeshit and make a fuss. When are the Militant-Marys going to learn to ignore stupid shit like this? The answer is NEVER because they are eternal cry babies who don’t know enough to simply ignore a kooky guy and his greasy restaurant.
“I am protesting all Chick-Fil-A restaurants here with my life partner to show unity against bigotry against gays,” said Bertram Vardenhill of Atlanta as he stuffed a handful of curly fries into his mouth. ( he actually did).
“We have been eating here for eight years and if we knew that Dan Cathy was against our love we would have gladly gone to Wendy’s and eat classic triple burgers and fries and a frosty Blizzard. Now we have eaten all that food and we’re fat. We are okay about being fat because we’re happy to be what other people call white trash, but we would have liked to have gained all our weight in a restaurant who sees gays as equals.”
Ugh — does the insanity ever end?
So now, to show support for Cathy, the folks who shares his opinions — the deep south people who believe in god and man and woman marriage, came out in droves to buy a lot of shit from Chik-Fil-A restaurants. They stood in line in the blazing sun just to get a wing and a prayer and to show “the gays” that there are two sides to every order…er….I mean issue.
According to Chick-Fil-A execs, the little-chicken-place-that-could set a company record. In other words, because “the gays” made a fuss about something so dumb, they made asses out of themselves and let their detractors swarm in and give them a good “what fer” — are you familiar with that expression? In other words, they got their asses whooped. Hey, whatever turns you on….
So now, to add dumbness to dumbness, “the gays” are planning a “KISS IN.” This is going to be so lovely.
Gay rabble rousers from all over the country who never even heard of Chick-Fil-A are going to come in and sit outside the restaurants and make out. Some will wear golden jock straps and leather speedos and chaps — the usual kooks who show up at this crazy shit.
But isn’t it all so charming? Doesn’t this whole mess make you proud to be a big fat American?
Are these gay militants looking for trouble? YOU BET THEY ARE! The media is ready with all their heavy duty artillery to focus in on any Yahooooo who calls anybody a gay slur or if any fights break out — it’s going to be a train wreck simply because “the gays” do not know enough to shut the fuck up and go to another restaurant.
I still like the fact that a deep south CEO who comes out against gay marriage is named Dan Cathy — that’s the shit! WTF was he thinking?