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TCM Sucks Without Robert Osborne and Here’s Why.

robert osborne

TCM Sucks Without Robert Osborne and Here’s Why.

If you’ve been wondering why TURNER CLASSIC MOVIES, once perhaps the finest network on cable TV, is starting to stink like a rotten fish, you need look no further than the new faces who are now working there both in front of the camera and behind the scenes.  The new blood seems to have no knowledge of film and no taste in film.  Instead, they subliminally flaunt a sick fixation for focusing on phony diversity, crappy movies, and some really dumb promotional gimmicks.robert osborne

“TCM used to be the TV station you could always turn to when you needed the comfort of a classic film.  It had taste, and standards, and dignity….and it had Robert Osborne,”  said TV writer Dave Matt.   Read about him here. –   Dave M talks about Robert Osborne.

(UPDATE:  ROBERT OSBORNE DIED SHORTLY AFTER THIS WAS WRITTEN)

Nowadays, with Osborne somewhere in the distant horizon –  and no one really knowing what’s going on with him apart from the fact that he’s old — TCM has lost its allure and class, and the only thing that saves it from being just another crappity cable show is that every now and then you get a brief look at someone like Bette Davis or Basil Rathbone or Olivia deHavilland, etc.   The rest of the time you’re watching newer movies laced with profanity or obscure art films that bore you to death.  Yes, these are movies too, and they have their place in the archive of film history, but most of it is pure pretense… and people are tuning out.

ALECBetween moments of cinema greatness, you have to sit through some really stupid stuff simply because a whole bunch of the staff at TCM were laid off.  Someone named Jennifer Dorian stepped in to cover for the whole lot, and she might be partially responsible for the new “getting-shitty” TCM.

We prefer, however, to blame the dip in quality on the politically oriented  hosts and amateur talents who taint the entire concept of what was once TCM.

“Even before Jennifer Dorian, the whole shakeup at TCM,  and the semi-vanishing of Robert Osborne, there were still glimmers of some really shitty things to come on the horizon.”  Excerpt from:   Dave M talks about Robert Osborne.

It all started when Alec Baldwin somehow pushed his way onto the set — and let’s face it — that is what he did.  This big dope, this politically moronic Neanderthal bully, managed to snag a short stint as a co-host alongside Robert Osborne.  It took about 10 minutes for anyone with a brain to figure out that Alec Baldwin knows nothing about movies, and that he’s just an impostor who spouts meaningless cinephile-speak.   He doesn’t even know how to pronounce FILM NOIR properly.   Baldwin makes stuff up as he goes along — which is a sickening propensity shared by a lot of dimwitted celebrities  when they’re not reading lines written for them on a teleprompter.

Alec Baldwin, with poor Robert Osborne noticeably squirming in his seat, authoritatively opined about classic films with descriptions things like:  “You can see here how Hitchcock, in this ‘FILM NEW-ARE’ (film noir)  was coaxing the sweat from your brow and convincing the hair on the back of your neck to stand up.”

Come on, Alex!  Get the f**k out of here!   Thankfully, he’s gone…for the time being.  He’ll probably bully his way back dressed as Donald Trump while talking up movies about American Presidents.   Yes. it might get that dumb over at TCM.  In fact, I predict a full-out politically-slanted image for TCM in the near future.

I have chosen to exclude Sally Field from my list of shitty people on TCM because I think she is mentally sick and I would not want to say something bad about her — except that she is mentally sick in the kind of way where you don’t have to feel bad about mocking.

Another sign of the shitty decline which didn’t really show itself until the Presidential election of 2016, is the fact that Ben Mankiewicz, the guy who stepped up to do weekends a few years ago, and seemed to be somewhat tolerable, has turned out to be just another Hollywood Liberal Turd with his stupid and “nobody-is-watching” Young Turks news program.

BENMankiewicz sat at the Young Turks News Desk ( if you can call it that)  on election night along with his panel of totally untalented, uninteresting and utterly unlikable cast of young Turks and bemoaned the election of Donald Trump.  Of course this was  not related to his duties on TCM, but that kind of moonlighting shit trickles into the whole diorama that is TCM.  

Here’s the thing, Ben:  When a TV show has class, and Hollywood Politics starts to leak in, the viewers flee because the show starts to become coarse.  And, like Hollywood itself, the whole shebang loses its charm and allure.   Because of this Hollywood Politics factor that seems to be knocking at the core of TCM, the show has changed and become…SHTICKY.    Do you know what I mean when I say SHTICKY?  It’s almost as though the commentators should be accompanied by some canned laughter.

Now, to make this all even worse, TCM has aired these new segments where they bring in “viewer” co-hosts, and of course these people have no camera presence and they bore you to death.

There is a solid reason why some people are fans/viewers and some people are on-air hosts.    The fans, for the most part, totally stink as hosts and should not be set before a camera.

It’s all so dumb…but not as dumb as the TCM WINE CLUB.

What merchandising skunk came up with that stupid idea?   “Yes, this hearty Merlot goes great with any Bela Lugosi movie because its dark and dangerous aromas take us back to a bleak  forest….”   Gimme a break already.  It’s so dumb that it’s not even worth writing about.   Please, if you have any dignity at all over at TCM,  get rid of that TCM Wine Club.   You don’t need grapes, you need likable stars – if they’re still alive and functioning – to introduce the films for which they are famous.

Here’s an example:

“They had some nobody introduce THE BAD SEED when they probably could have gotten Patty McCormack herself to introduce the movie.  She’s a very talented and engaging actress — and she is very much still around.  Why do you need some nobody in that seat across from whomever, when the real thing is probably ready, willing and able to not only do the job, and hundreds of thousands will tune in to watch them do it?  

“Hollywood and movies only exist because people get sick of seeing everyday people in their daily lives.  TCM movies are the escape from the fact that, while we love our neighbors, they shouldn’t be on TV introducing films.  

“Of course you can’t dig up most of the dead stars who play in these films, but at least make an effort to recruit some names.  You know what, why don’t you pick up a phone and actually give the job to someone like Patty McCormack or Eve Plumb or a dozen other stars who would fit very nicely on TCM.  There are some classy people out there in Hollywood who would do a great job.” Excerpt from:   Dave M talks about Robert Osborne.

SUMMATION:   Without Robert Osborne – now deceased- Turner Classic Movies is slowly getting shittier and shittier.  Eventually it will have commercials and a reality show.   If you’ve tuned into TCM lately you might hear, “Sorry, wrong number.”  Not the movie – the operator.

105 Comments
  1. TCM misses ( on purpose ) yet again. July 14th, Bastille Day . TCM titles their schedule ” Bastille Day “and could have run ” A Tale of Two Cities” and ” Marie Antoinette “. No, instead they are showing ” My Journey Through French Cinema ” , “Rules of the Game ” and two other movies that have NOTHING to do with the French Revolution.

  2. July 14th, Bastille Day spotlighted by TCM . Not with ? ” Marie Antoinette” or with ” A Tale Of Two Cities “. Nope . A documentary about French cinema a bunch of French movies having nothing to do with Bastille Day or French history.

  3. I concur with most of the comments. “Classic” has disappeared from TCM. Each time I find the station I wonder whether there will actually be great movie on. It’s sad that the new power brokers have hijacked this great network. You’re wrong, Ben. Robert would NOT approve.

    And while I like some of the hosts, I find the “mutual adoration society” laughable. If you’re good, the viewers will let you know. You shouldn’t have to sell one another. Rather than promoting yourselves, go back to the original, unique programming the fans loved. We can find what you’re shelling out now on dozens of other stations.

  4. “Women Make Film ” 14 week of this , 100% agenda driven. Summer under the stars .. really ? Dorothy Dandrige is the star of the month for September. She was in some movies but a movie star?

  5. She’s black ain’t she? Being black makes you EVERYTHING on TCM. Next month will be dedicated to the great work of Buckwheat.

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