A website dedicated to human stupidity and dumbness

Lindsey Piscitell — the great poet. The bard of Bryant Park

NEWS FROM THE FUTURE: 

YEAR 2898 – HERE ARE SOME OF THE LOST LINDSEY PISCITELL POEMS –THANKFULLY THEY HAVE BEEN RESTORED BY THE DAMIEN ZONE’S TEAM OF RESTORATION SCIENTISTS.

 There once was Glenn Beck on a blanket

But I’m Lindsey and I am entitled to crank it….

Up a notch with my jug of cheap wine

People now know my name so divine.

Now I’m sober and I wish to hell that I’d drank it.

 

The Search For Appletini’s in Autumn

The leaves are falling down like so many yellow dead canaries

I remember my parrot calling to me while I cooked chicken piccata for the hot guy

He fixed my car and our eyes met when I gave him my nearly empty bank card

Then we made love and he never called me back because I was wrong for him – he had a job

I so enjoyed the really nice bottle of Sutter Home Chardonnay he brought — or was it Corbett Canyon?

It doesn’t matter for now it has long been peed into the sewage that leads to the mighty Atlantic

And…now he is gone and I search for an appletini amidst steel towers that mock me

For I am small and they are big

And the piles of dead canaries are now whisked away by a man with a sucker machine

When winter comes there will be more appletini friends looking to come in from the cold

But now I will have to settle for a mochachino

My liver cells breath a sigh of relief

For I found no appletini.

THANK YOU:  You can read my actual opinion here — http://thedamienzone.com/?p=4762

 

3 Comments
  1. Ah….Lindsay, uhm….well, can I like…ah…get…back to you on this?

  2. I think she rents out rooms in her apartment. Anyone going to visit NY city should contact her. See reviews at:
    https://roomorama.com/users/18035

  3. Fuck her and fuck her rooms for rent — just a business geared towards misfits who are too cheap to pay for a hotel.

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