Ron Palillo — ARNOLD HORSHACK — DEAD and STILL UNFUNNY

Everybody thought his EW! EW! EW! –  thing was funny — IT WAS NOT!. 

Everybody thought his nasal voice was funny  — IT WAS NOT!

And now that Ron “HORSHACK” Palillo is dead, he is being hailed as a comedic genius — he was not a comedic genius.  He wasn’t even funny.  He wasn’t anything but a white Steve Irkle. 

Sorry — but you know it’s true – and if you thought he was funny it’s a sure sign that you are/were/will always be, a moron.

Of course all the Facebook losers will share quotes about how “great” he was when in fact he was a nobody with a resume that wouldn’t even get him a part as an extra in a Hooterville, Indiana Dinner Theater production of The Music Man.

What’s really funny is how a person dies and everyone sings their praises like that other dirt bag Steve Jobs.  That is not to say that Ron Palillo was a dirt bag, but he was basically a VERY VERY VERY marginally talented guy — not even good enough for dinner theater in Iowa — but he got lucky — and good for him.  But there’s a hitch — he thought he was an artiste!  He thought he was better than just Horshack.   SORRY!  WRONG! 

Word out to Ron — God bless you —  wherever you are:  You were so freaking lucky to get that part because when all is said and done, you really had no talent and you never had another legitimate acting job after that. 

Excuse me for sounding cruel but people get so maudlin and sappy about stupid shit like this and it’s my job to set the record straight – and speaking of straight….he wasn’t.  That didn’t help his career either.  41 years with the same guy will give any queen a heart attack.

You’d think his fellow gay costar would have helped him?  But NO!!!!!  He said, “Up your nose with a rubber hose, Ron” — which was also incredibly unfunny.  What the fuck were people in the 1970s thinking?

Welcome back Kotter was NOT a funny show.   It was dopey and shticky.  Had it not been for John Travolta as Vinny Barbarino, the show would have not made it past episode one.  

Now look at John Travolta — going from one steam room to the next for a hand job — maybe he bumped into Ron Palillo in the steamy showers and despite Ron’s pleas for a part in anything — just anything, John just move on to the next hot guy and stepped over the aging and totally not sexy Palillo.

Look — face the facts — yes it is sad that he is dead — but let’s not hold him up as though he was an important comedic figure in the history of TV.  If anything, he was one of the early representations of what it meant to be UNFUNNY in American  TV — he may even be the ultimate icon of no talent. 

His acting resume after “Kotter” reads like the career of a failed actor.  If he had any talent — or any of the people from that dopey show had any talent — wouldn’t John Travolta have helped him get jobs?  Wouldn’t he have even done a little something?  

And to add insult to injury, he was a DRAMA COACH at a college.  How the fuck could he be teaching drama to students when he no talent himself?  It reminds me of Lee Strasberg — just an old nobody who made people believe he was a great acting coach because he could not make it as an actor  — he was a fucking asshole with no talent and no range.  He could play old Jewish men — end of story — but somehow he pulled all the strings because actors are too fucking stupid to know when they are being hoodwinked.

Lesson to kids who take drama classes:  You probably have no talent and the only person who has less talent than you is the guy who teaches your class.  UGH!   Go to trade school and learn air conditioning and refrigeration because the odds of getting lucky like Palillo are one in a billion — and the more you want to be famous, the less likely it is that you will even be a blip on a radio telescope on Alpha Centuari.  

Yeah, so Horshack is dead — sorry to see him go — I am sure the new age of extremely untalented sitcom stars will come along in due time to take his place.