At a recent gig at Fifi’s Bowling Alley Bar and Grill, it was announced that comic Joe Rogan will replace Joey Lawrence on the squirmingly bad and unfunny ABC Family show “Melissa and Joey.” it is rumored that Rogan who is best known, and most talented at, making people eat live cockroaches and for setting off metal detectors with his iron fillings hair transplant, will replace Joey Lawrence because producers want the show to be even less funny but they want to keep the weird hair concept intact.
“It’s sounds cray,” said Italian film producer Mildren Sclafani who is a source close to the show.
“You would think that the producers want the show to be funnier but this time TV has taken a step forward. For the sake of art, the producers feel that adding Joe Rogan as a fulcrum for unfunniness will enable the show to reach new heights of unintentional unfunniness. It’s a bold move but they hope that the show will become so bad that it’s good. I think it’s a great move for TV sitcoms as a form of performance art.”
There has been no comment about any of this from the Rogan camp but the big time comic has been busy playing gigs at places so out of the way that there is no cell phone service. The report that came in from Fifi’s Bowling alley in the wilds of northern Quebec came about only because one die-hard Rogan fan had a pocket full of change and called it in on an old pay phone.
“I normally use zee change for zee drinks, you know,” said Coco Montagne of Isle St. Lucien, Quebec. “So they ask me, they say that they need zee moeny for zee phone and I had with me maybe close to four dollars in coins. The phone work good so we make the call but then I have no money for a beer, but maybe I do a good ting, no?”
Melissa Joan Hart must be getting annoyed that she can’t have a real co-host with real talent and comedic skills. Sources say that she is not on board with this “artistic but unfunny” thing and that she might bail out of the show altogether.
Sources say that they can’t find any actress unfunny enough to pair with Joe Rogan and that if Hart goes, the whole thing goes down the drain — which would really suck for Joe Rogan because his next gig in Setlaka Alleutian Islands, Alaska has not sold out and the club that holds fifty people was supposed to be his next big gig.