Little People, Big Terrorists? NYPD Connects The Dots.

Not one midget was killed on 9-11 <——click here.

“We just don’t think that midgets should be down here trying to do what normal people do,” said New York City subway patrolman John Brady as he kicked a midget dressed as Michael Jackson in New York Penn Station. 

 “It’s an insult to Michael Jackson and people of average height  and to all the people from five foot two to six feet seven who got killed on 9-11.  We don’t even want the mayor down here cause he’s only five-one, but Michael J. Fox is okay because he has Parkinson’s. ”

This kind of midget hatred is not indigenous to New York City alone.  Last year a midget Micheal Jackson impersonator was beaten and robbed in Gateshead, England in what was deemed to be a random act of violence.

The hatred in New York, however,  is rooted in the little known fact that has haunted tri-state metropolitan midgets since 9-11 -the tragic day that changed all of our lives forever.  It seems that not one midget or dwarf was killed on 9-11, and that has conspiracy theorists wondering and city officials on edge when they see little people putting on a show in the subway. 

“These little bastards get away with all kinds of shit,”  said one loudmouthed New Yorker.  “You’se wanna find Osam Bin Laden then you’se should look in Munchkinland cause midgets are hiding him.  Not one fuckin midget got killed on 9-11 — not one!”

Another New York woman was less mouthy but still fearful.

“I just want to go home peacefully  and watch Moonstruck,” said Connie Vermiglia of Bensonhurst.  “I mean Cher did such a great Brooklyn accent.  It was unique — you don’t even hear that accent that’s how unique it was.  But now when I get home, even if Monnstruck has me distracted, I still wonder if there is a midget hiding under my bed.  It’s very disturbing to me because I’m a widow twenty-seven years now.”

So poor little Midget Michael Jackson will have to move on to another town — a town where his genius is appreciated.

“I used to be afraid that I would be trampled to death after a Bon Jovi concert let out,” said Midget Michael Jackson.  “Now people are accusing me of plotting to blow up the world.  I don’t want to hurt anyone.  All I want to do is moonwalk and grab my nutsack. ” 

He may be telling the truth, but it’s the dangers of what might hiding in the oversized nutsack that one so often finds on midgets and dwarfs.  Even at Disney theme parks the world over, security guards are keeping a sharp look out for terror midgets pretending to be street performers.

“I was walking my beat at Epcot,” said an unidentified undercover agent for Disney. “So  I grabbed this midget performer who was trying to hump Minnie Mouse with his huge ballsack and this little fucker gets all pissed off at me . He starts to resist and he says to me, ‘I’m not happy” so I say to him, ‘then which one are you.’  It’s stuff like that — I mean you get confused because of Snow White.   They even have zombies out there.

The CIA is not issuing any statements but it is a fact that not one midget or dwarf was killed on 9-11 yet in New York, all one sees are midgets.  It’s food for thought, and we at prefer to say “BEAT IT” to these little fuckers who are secretly trying to kill us.

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