He used to be a skinny little stick of a kid, but now he is a hulking beastly she-man with small balls and a whole lotta make-up. This sudden change in appearance has tongues wagging that Vegas comic Carrot Top may not only be putting steroids in his eyeliner, he might also be what sex doctors call a “gender-fuck.”
Yes, gender fuck is the scientific term for somebody who seems very feminine in one respect and very masculine in another, but some of his fans just don’t get it.
“I think he looks handsome,” said Minnie Rogers, 84, of Franklin Kansas. “I used to love Liberace but since he passed away so needlessly from that watermelon diet he was on, I have been hooked on Carrot Top. He has such big muscles and his eyelashes are so pretty. It’s like Rudolph Valentino all over again.”
That’s just a fan’s opinion. Doctors and scientists, however, have taken quite a diffrent view of Carrot Top’s new look.
“It’s time for gender fucks to come out of the gym and get to the Clinique Counter because true gender fucks are very hard to find,” said Dr. Philomina Cresto of The University of Rhode Island’s Advanced Center for Gender Fuck Studies.
“As a matter of fact, in the world of GLBTG, the letters GF (Gender Fuck) have not been added because there are too few out and out gender fucks — but mainly because there are already too many letters.”
“Carrot Top appears to have had surgery,” continued Dr. Cresto. “His face is more feminine and he’s also using a lot of cosmetics to make him look more girlish. His body however is pumped to nearly professional bodybuilding standards. We think he looks fabulous and we are reaching out to all gender fucks who might see Carrot Top and find bravery. If you are afraid of needles, put the steroids in your eyeliner or eyebrow pencil. It gets absorbed.
If you first give this GF “The Man In The Iron Mask” treatment, I’d hit it.
I guess if you put a paperbag over him it might be like screwing a Raggedy Andy doll, Pierre. That is sooooooo hot!