Joey Lawrence Hair Tragedy. Now He is a Chippendale Dancer?

TheDamienZone tried so hard to help Joey Lawrence when we good-naturedly joked about his spray-on hair and ten million hair transplants, but he didn’t listen.  Why didn’t he just get a really good hairpiece?  Why?  Did we have to draw a map for you, Joey?

Here is an example of a young actor who, unlike Joey Lawrence was not afraid to wear a wig in order to get a starring role in a hit web series Di Giacomo.

Here’s the the thing, folks.  Actors who have great hair stay on top.  Actors who go bald drift away.  It’s not like the old days when nobody knew who was bald and who wasn’t.  The great French actor Charles Boyer wore a hairpiece in all of his films but he would yank it off as soon as the cameras stopped rolling.  He didn’t care because in his day there were no Perez Hilton’s or TMZ to spread around that gossip — today he wouldn’t have a shot — but that’s not totally true.

Do you honestly think that all these actors who were teen idols in the 80s and 90s stiill have alll their hair?  Think about it.  They all do something to keep their hair looking at age 50 the way it looked when they were 20.  They know where to go and they know who to see.   Nobody makes fun of good fake hair because nobody knows it’s fake.  Why didn’t Joey go this route and get good fake hair instead of butchering his head with a zillion transplant plugs and then dye his scalp brown to go for the “shaved” look while he waited to see if those hair plugs would grow in?  It looks terrible.  He looked like Grandpa Munster for cryin’ out loud!

So now, because he looked like such a freak for the past three years, he is letting the plugs grown in and his head looks like a crop circle in the UFO infested wheat fields of England.  What did that get him?  A big TV deal?  A big movie deal?  NO!  It got him a cheap job as a male stripper at Chippendale’s in Las Vegas.  Can you imagine that?  Yeah, he’s all pumped up and waxed and manscaped but his hair looks like shit — and what happened to his career?

Truth be told, Joey Lawrence was never much of a star really.  At best he was a cute kid who could do the sitcom bad-acting that passes as funny/good acting in Hollywood – but then he got the wild idea that he was a singer and songwriter.  Quick name a famous Joey Lawrence song!  BONG!  Times up!  There aren’t any — he is not a good singer or musician and now he’s a bald stripper?  How did that happen?  He went bald and didn’t do the right thing.  Why didn’t he get a good hairpiece — why?   The old stigma of the proverbial “rug” is over as long as you know where to go.  Hair pieces today are undetectable — if you are willing to get the right ones.   Why didn’t you listen to TheDamienZone, Joey?   Now you’re a stripper —  what a tragedy — a tragedy.