Osama Bin Laden, 54, of Pakistan, died today at his home surrounded by friends and family. Mr. Obama was a self-employed terrorist who briefly worked in his family construction business as a child. He was influential in his community and even started the humanitarian organization The Taliban to help troubled women in Afghanistan. He fought in the war against the Soviet Union and a bunch of other war-like things. Mr. Obama was a member of the Pakistan Rotary and Knights Templar. He is survived by his wives, Hula, Zoola, Minimar, Nurnola, and Joyce; his sons Andahar, Abrahim Anduhar, Abrahem, and 36 sons named Muhammad with various spellings. Viewings are at Thursday and Friday, 2-4 and 7-9 at Brownhsty-Mukros Home For Funerals. Interment will be at sea followed by a luncheon celebrating his life at Manny’s House Of Steak And Pork in Breuwster.
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