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“Don’t touch my junk,” says incredibly small penis victim John Tyner.

TDZ:  (San Diego, CA USA)   “He only wanted to go pheasant hunting with his father in North Dakota to prove his manhood in spite of his…well you know,”  said a source close to John Tyner.  “You see, he suffers from a rare disorder called micro-penis excitation syndrome and he was afraid the inspectors would find it, but at the same time he is aroused when they do.  It’s been a struggle for him his entire life.”

John Tyner refused to be patted down and his cell phone, which was left on in the video making mode captured his planned moment on video.  Now the video where he tells a TSA agent, “Don’t touch my junk” has gone viral.  Executives at the major networks are planning to costar Tyner and safety slide airline steward Steven Slater in a reality dating show where they can see how long Slater can date Tyner and how long he will tolerate his small penis.  They plan to call it, Don’t Touch My Junk If You Can Find It.

“The penis is very small in the micro-penis patient,” said Dr. Helmett Head of the Universitie de Lyon’s department of urology in Lyon, France.  “Often they are so ashamed of the micro penis that they subconsciously want it to be seen or spoken about.  It occurs so rarely and we have only had one other case since 1957.”

John Tyner’s penis measures 1/2 inch when fully erect.  His testicles are normal sized but that only makes the penis look smaller.  There is nothing doctors can do, but the one doctor who is willing to try is 5,000 miles away and John Tyner is no longer permitted to fly with his small fly.

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