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Joe Rogan Is Not Funny and His Hair Transplants Look Like Iron Filings.

Joe Rogan Is Not Funny and His Hair Transplants Look Like Iron Filings.

Before I get to the fact that Joe Rogan is totally unfunny or interesting, I would like to shout out to the doctor who did Rogan’s iron-filings hair transplant.

Hey, Doc!  When you made that totally drawn-in U shaped hairline on Joe Rogan’s head, were you playing with one of those little cheap toys where you move the iron filings onto the man’s head with a little magnet?  It sure looks like that’s what you did.  Funny that Rogan sounds a lot like Rogaine – and he’s dumpy and plumpy and ugly too.  His pants looked like they hadn’t been washed in years.  If anybody looks like they have ass odor, It’s Joe Rogan.

Okay — so anyway Joe Rogan is not funny.  He is painfully unfunny and sickening.  His routine about Dr. Phil is so unfunny that the audience seemed a little uneasy and squeamish between their nervous giggles.    After he finishes with the unfunny Dr. Phil routine, he does this thing about masturbation and self fellatio — he thinks it’s really cool and hip and edgy — but it’s not.  It’s stupid and vulgarity is used as a weak replacement for jokes — he doesn’t have any jokes so he talks about jerking off and hopes some pimply kids laugh.

He struts and frets his routine in a manic but poor imitation of Lewis Black.  Trouble is that Lewis Black is funny.  Rogan is NOT even remotely funny.    I watched something he did on Comedy Central and I thought it was amateur night.    Sadly, the only thing that was really funny about Joe Rogan was his iron-filings hair transplant.

66 Comments
  1. Oh the irony.

  2. Oh the iron — or maybe that’s what you meant.

  3. this article is totally written in hate, whoever wrote it must be a very unhappy person. the truth is Joe Rogan is really funny and smart; but more than that he is a good person who is promoting a great message to society. come on man quit hating and smoke some weed bro.

  4. Do you know how many times I hear “whoever wrote this must be a very unhappy person” ?????? It’s like sitting behind the RETURNS counter at Sears and hearing people say, “I already have one of these.” — Joe Rogan is anything but really funny and smart. Also, I do not hate him — I am making fun of him.

  5. well sir, lewis black sucks balls, also what the fuck are iron fillings hair transplants? your article sucks and you have the comedic taste of a seven year old from armenia. also all of the “edited” photos on here are fucking terrible, you need to learn how to torrent so you can download a good photo editing program, and stop putting little fucking white squares in everyone’s mouths it’s the dumbest shit i have ever seen. you are retarded and i hope that you and everything you love die in a terrible national tragedy of some type, like a massive natural disaster, or an airplane crashing on you

  6. Didn’t you ever see the little game where there is a bald cartoon man behind some cheap plastic and in there they put tiny iron-filings? You get a metal stick with the game and you move the filings to the top of his head or wherever you want — you can give him a head of hair (iron filings) or maybe a beard or maybe both. The guy gets hair but it looks weird — simply because his hair is made of timy shards or iron — get it? Maybe I should do a story about that game.

    Yes, so anyway, the cartoons are intentionally done poorly because that’s the way they have always been done — and I like to think that their badness is what makes them good. The Joe Rogan story does very well and it’s been hit about 59,000 times out of over 800 of my pieces — and only 2 negative letters.

    Maybe you should not wish for a national tragedy — you never know where you’ll be when it happens, right? Look at the bright side, Joe Rogan gets more hits on TheDamienZone.com than Macaulay Culkin or Zsa Zsa Gabor but way way way way less than Joey Lawrence and Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino. Also, I am sure that there are a lot of funny 7-year-old Armenians.

    “When you can tell jokes, you learn to take them as well.” Liberace 1955
    Damien

  7. I can understand someone not liking his comedy… well not really because its hilarious. But why do you have soo much hate to go and write a completely negative article about someone who has no influence on your life whatsoever?
    And to call him not smart? ……have you listened to his podcast?
    The dude LIVES education.. all he does is wirte comedy, blaze out, and watch documentaries… find me 1 conversation recorded of joe rogan talking about something and getting facts wrong. you cant.
    Oh, and go google ” Joe rogan tiger ” if you can watch that bit without laughing, ill 100% support everything you say about joe rogan.
    p.s if you say your watched it without laughing, it just confirms your a liar.

  8. He has never even made me crack a smile — as a matter of fact, i watched dopey Ellen Degeneres last night and she made me laugh — and I remarked to a friend that she was the first person who made me laugh in ages.

  9. Joe rogan is one of the funniest people I know, just because you have a different taste in comedy doesn’t mean you should go around writing bullshit.

  10. Yes, it is a matter of taste, but keep in mind that my sense of taste is better than your sense of taste, and I am a better judge of who and what is is funny.

  11. Dear Sirs,
    Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet Internet

  12. I approve of this message. FastTrack
    joerogan.net
    fuckyoufaggot@gmail.com

  13. the fact that you have admited that ellen is the first person to make you laugh in ages is very impressive. i’m always impressed when a semi retarded grandmother is capable of using mspaint and has the ability to blog. please thank whatever grandchild that still bothers to visit you for the UNINTENTIONAL comedy your ramblings have produced.

    we’re laughing at you, not with you. remind yourself of that daily.

  14. This is like a faggier version of what Perez Hilton does. Can’t help but notice that the majority of your “articles” have 0 comments.

    What was you’re name on the Rogan Board?

  15. That article was written by someone who’s never had the opportunity for a women to touch their penis.

  16. …and the letters just keep on coming. You can see that the fans are almost as funny as Joe Rogan himself.

    Damien

  17. “i watched dopey Ellen Degeneres last night and she made me laugh”

    And, therein lies your problem, idiot.

  18. or maybe you just have no sense of humor. and just because you dont like his comedy doesnt mean it sucks you ignorant fuck. who the fuck are you to pass judgement on someone else ESPECIALLY joe fuckin rogan. and making people look like u on paint probly makes you feel better about urself doesnt it? go suck a dick you fucking cunt.

  19. Yes, Joe Rogan is very important to TheDamienZone — but nobody reads the stories about him except really smart people like you.

    damien legallienne

  20. pfft calling joe rogan unoriginal, and then turn around and use a rogaine joke. har. har. har. fucking hysterical. If you dont like his comedy then dont watch it, nobody asked you to comment on it, and obviously no one likes you commenting on it. Just scroll up if you dont believe me.

    Putting your name after a comment is retarded, its not a letter artard, and its clearly not formal.

    Just commenting on this makes me feel stupid because i know youre too small minded to believe what anyone is telling you about yourself. Grow up damien legallienne.

  21. What’s funnier is that you’re so fucking stupid — you invented a DDM email (fake) but yet you addressed the letter to DL. That’s the OTHER Damian (note the spelling) — Idiot — Joe Rogan is unfunny and were you to have a stroke in the street, he would step right over you for making him late for his appearance as the “celebrity” at a new bowling alley opening.

    I put my name after a comment because I am not a star fucking, celebrity-worshipping American cuntlapper like you,

    Damien LeGallienne.

  22. Comedy is subjective you narcissistic fuck. You write your blogs as if you were at the center of the universe; as if your disposition was crafted by the gods. You may not have a taste for Joe Rogan, but the numbers prove how misguided you are. Joe Rogan’s podcast is ranked #14 out of over 115,000 podcasts available (in English alone) on iTunes! That means millions if followers! You’ve obviously made a career of pulling people down to attract attention. It must pain you to realize you have failed to achieve the same level of success as your targets. Your opinions are simple, personal judgements engrossed in hate. You’re a sad silly bitch. 

  23. Yes, girl with fake slutty-sounding name — because I don’t like the unfunny comic that you like, I am all the names you called me. Do me a favor, okay. Stick with the chicken wings and hot sauce — you sound like a retard. How’s that for a simple personal judgement — and — “engrossed in hate” makes no sense. Stop trying to be profound. Stick with being the ugly girl who pretends she likes football so guys will talk to her. Help! I can’t stop making hateful, personal judgements.

  24. Gabriela is my real name. Last name is Italian as well. Engrossed in hate actually does make sense. Read a book. Funny how u jabbed at my personal appearance and personality when you don’t know me. Your personality, however, IS on display for all and it’s laughable that you’ve made a career out of being a third rate Perez Hilton. Bwahaha silly bitch.

  25. Relax man. I’m sure you’re a good guy with your own problems and shit. Whenever you take negatively about somebody, you put yourself in a bad place where you’re angry. You create this frustration out of nothing. Don’t worry; we’re all guilty of it. Ironically, I learned that from the Joe Rogan Experience.
    When you convince yourself that Joe Rogan is unamusing and asinine, it becomes true. No matter what, every time you listen to Joe, you’ve already decided that he’s not funny. However, if you open up to the possibility that he is indeed a great comic, then you might find that he is. This could introduce a new pleasure into your life that makes you laugh and think.

    Much love and respect, Phalkore, proud flesh-light user

  26. Your very last sentence was more than ample testament to your own, even less funny, Joe Rogan unfunniness.

  27. Well I guess there’s no chance in convincing you of Joe’s comedic talents. Have you ever heard of Bill Hicks’? He’s much funnier and more righteous than Joe.

  28. Did Joe Fuck your mom or something? Why are you so butthurt young man? To take the time out and go out of your way to hate on someone and write a blog about him is a super bitch move. I am sure you lack pussy and respect from your other equally as cunty peers and probably live a miserable life but hating on the next man will not get you out of the hole that being a cunt has buried you in.

  29. Mencia?

  30. Joe Rogan is very deep,intelligent, and philosophical. Its likely that you’re just insecure if you cant just relax and be comfortable and enjoy the comedy gold as Joe Rogan breaks down the humorous psychology/situational events that take place during masturbation,sex, and whatnot. No need to try to relate your feelings to the crowd. I have been to many shows of his and the majority of the crowd knows what they’re going in to see. Furthermore you the man has made a VERY comfortable living doing his comedy. so i’d say thats proof of him being FUNNY!

  31. DDM “Do you know how many times I hear “whoever wrote this must be a very unhappy person” ?” If you hear this often you should really stop to listen…

  32. DDM “He has never even made me crack a smile — as a matter of fact, i watched dopey Ellen Degeneres last night and she made me laugh — and I remarked to a friend that she was the first person who made me laugh in ages.”

    Ah okay I think i get this you’re clearly trolling here right now.. also average person laughs 15 times a day. You scrooge of a person

  33. …”the first person who made me laugh in ages.” is figurative — do you know that? Do you also know that the more you comment on this blog, the more money I earn? So if you want to get even with me for insulting your unfunny idol, stop commenting. I just made $7.31US off of your stupidity. So you see, I am not a mean guy — I could let you sit there and waste all your time commenting your life away while I raked in a few bucks at a time, but I don’t have the heart to do that. And you know what’s really sad? You — believe it or not — are the 1 millionth visitor to this blog this year — yes — this is why I am here watching. You are the 1,000,000th unique visitor this year and I was thinking about giving away a prize or something — but not now. Scram — or keep earning money for me.

  34. DDM ‘I put my name after a comment because I am not a star fucking, celebrity-worshipping American cuntlapper like you,

    Damien LeGallienne.”

    Ah maybe you’re not trolling you’re just dumb? Your reasoning here made no sense whatsoever.

  35. …yes my friend I did get that your “the first person who made me laugh in ages.” comment was probably not 100% accurate. Id feel safe saying you havent broke 10,000 visits.. lets be real here.

  36. You can have $7.31 to read this:
    You are a pathetic cunt.
    Have a nice day 🙂

  37. Sorry — 1,000,000 in 2012 — and the 1 millionth was YOU — I was worried that I wouldn’t make a million visits this year because the year’s been winding down, but a few hours ago I noticed that I was only 177 away and in 28 minutes YOU were the 1,000.000th. Trust me — 1 million — google the name of the blog — or pay $39.00 to one of those buy-a-blog websites and find out for yourself. Okay — that’s all — keep commenting. You’re up to $10.07US — thanks

  38. UNIQUE VISITS PAGES
    Total 1,000,209 2,931,997 8,448,858 1113.00 GB

    Stats as per 1:55pm PST. USA – Source – Los Angeles,CA.

  39. Joe Rogan Saved my family from starvation and helped my mother achieve an orgasm.Please do not hate on such a handsome man. Thank you. Signed. Colonel Sanders.

  40. DDM all of a sudden thinks he’s the shit because of the “unique visits” this blog is getting…

    Let me tell you something DDM. Do you know how many people write to, tells him in person and congratulate him (Joe) for his open minded which is full of positivity and for having the ability to project realness unto his audience and even people online through his podcast? Do you know that the dude is helping to turn cunts into humble and condiderate indivuduals?

    How many people tell YOU how great you are for contributing to society with your awsomeness? Yeah thought so.

    Joe & Company, specially Duncan Trussell, by just watching and or listening to their podcasts that have help more than my own parents have on the intellectual level. Joe & Co, they have helped me and made me realize the deep the cunt road that leads to haterism I was riding, the very same road you are on…

    Do yourself a big favour, indulge into some good marijuana, the type that opens up your mind and go listen to Joe’s podcast, specially the ones that challenge your intellectual and you’ll see that everything you wrote about Joe in your blog couldn’t be more further from the truth.

    But then again, if people don’t want to embrasse change, then they continue living their cunty lives filled with the very same poison you intake, hate is a powerful poison.

    I’ll go and lit up a good one and think of people like you, think of how fucking good I feel now that I can see everything from the outside in, it’s soo refreshing and soul powering, you should try it.

    //Mold Sandwich @ The Rogan Board.

  41. Woah, I seen you deleted my comment. I stand corrected then, some will remain cunts and thats cool too, in the reverse type of way.

  42. you went through alll the trouble of making a website about it? so much butthurt here.

  43. Can you read, asswipe? The website has over 2,000 blog entries — 3 of them are about Joe Rogan. Do you see the stupidity? Learn to read. The “get a life” thing is really OLD!

  44. I seen? You mean I saw? More proof of the Joe Rogan influence of stupidity.

  45. Funny —

  46. DDM, english is not my native language, but I see that ignorance oozes from you in a major way, only thing you could do is correct my spelling and you missed the rest of my message.

    Good luck with your life, you need it.

  47. …and human is not your native species.

  48. rogan is leading a movement with the top downloaded podcast. he is reaching ears across the globe and connecting to kids who have no real direction with a positive message.

    your message is hateful and full of jealousy. the only views on this page are from joe’s fans.

    Train by day…

  49. What a negative cunt this guy is, quit hatin on Joe you fucking NOTHING. TRAIN BY DAY, JOE ROGAN PODCAST ALL NIGHT… ALL DAY.

  50. Don’t be a pussy and approve it

    Editor’s note: The name on this comment comes to us via the hatred of one of my readers — so I did something I have never done — I have added something to this comment in the hopes that many of the people who commented will see the light — so read this — you’ll thank me later. http://thedamienzone.com/?p=7112

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