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Alabama Governor Only Governs Christians.

Alabama Gov. Robert Bentley, a recent escapee from a lunatic asylum, told a church crowd just moments into his new administration that those who have not accepted Jesus as their savior are not his brothers and sisters, shocking some critics who questioned Tuesday whether he can be fair to non-Christians.

“Anybody here today who has not accepted Christ as their savior, I’m telling you, you’re not my brother and you’re not my sister, and I want to be your brother,” Bentley said Monday, his inauguration day, according to the psychiatrists who ran around trying to get the straight-jacket back on him.

The Anti-Defamation League on Tuesday called Bentley’s remarks shocking, but they kind of feel the same way about all Christians when they are in control. 

“His comments are not only offensive, but also raise serious questions as to whether non-Christians can expect to receive equal treatment during his tenure as governor,” said Bill Nigut, the ADL’s regional director.

Speaking at Dexter Avenue King Memorial Church after the official inaugural ceremony, Bentley told the crowd that he considered anyone who believed in Jesus to be his brothers and sisters regardless of color, but anyone who isn’t a Christian doesn’t have that same relationship to him.

The good news is that since the new Governor does not recognize non Christians, Jews, Muslims, Atheists and all others can run amuck in Alabama without fear of being governed.  A band of Zoroastrians were seen heading to Best Buy to loot some Flat Screen TVs.

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