Do you know Michael Musto? Perhaps you’ve seen his creepy fat-yet-sunken face on TV or anywhere else where ladies talk about fashion? Maybe you’ve read his uninteresting column in the Village Voice — it’s right next to the all-male chat line phone numbers advertisements.
Perhaps you follow him on Twitter because you need to mindlessly pass the time reading the opinions of this looks-fat-but-is-really-shriveled fuktard who will only wear Snooki flip flops on his feet because there is either something wrong with them or he is insane.
Even in the dead of winter — rain – snow – sleet or hail — Michael Musto will only wear rubber flip flops, but when the weather is yukky he covers the flip flops with plastic bags that are secured around his ankles with electrical tape. That’s normal, right? I mean, if you’re going to be so creepy to look at, why not at least put on a pair of nice shoes? Maybe it will draw attention away from your HUGE-but-shrunken-HEAD! Yes, Michael Musto, you need to make fun of Chris Christie.
Hey, Michael Musto, you used to be a fat tub of lard but you dieted yourself into nothingness. In spite of all your dieting and gym classes you still look fat. Your head and your face are perpetually fat. It’s hopeless. You didn’t lose weight and get better looking. You lost weight and got sickly and weird looking. You have one of those lumpy bodies that will not muscle up no matter how hard you work out. Your waistline is jelly, and its girth is either 28 or 46 depending on how much your tighten your belt because you’re just squeezing your own mushy and shapeless self.
Okay, so you folks either know or don’t know Michael Musto. Even if you know him, kindly note that he will not make eye-contact with you when you speak to him. He continually stares at the ground like a little weirdo, yet he somehow manages to look directly into the camera when he’s on the air for some girly thing.
Anyway, Musto’s latest column is one where he mocks New Jersey Governor Chris Christie for having a form of gastric (lap-band) bypass operation to help him lose weight.
Why does Michael Musto poke fun at the Governor’s weight problem? Isn’t that mean? Isn’t that intolerant? No it’s not because Chris Christie is not gay. He is not a minority. He is not a bullied teen. He is not a Democrat, and he is not a shrunken-faced gossip columnist. It’s okay to make fun of him.
Anyway, Michael Musto is an asshole and he would never have written this stupid piece if Chris Christie were a Democrat or a gay man.
Go buy some shoes, you brillo-headed, shrunken fat faced moron Michael Musto. You shoeless fuktard! Maybe if you were good looking when you were young, you wouldn’t be so bitter. You’re a horror show now — imagine what you must have looked like when you were twenty-one — and your feet — YOUR FEET! UGH!