Elton John has a baby! Congratulations! It’s a bottom.

The doctor in the delivery room was happy to announce that Elton John had given birth to a bouncing baby boy bottom.  While most gay couples yearn to have a hot jock kid who grows up to be a tough and total top, the John’s are happy that their little bottom is healthy. 

Elton was not available for comment because he was getting his anus tightened so it can be like it was when he was 21 — they can do that now when you have an anal baby. 

Reports are that the baby is a little chatterbox and that he even started dishing the dirt about the other babies in the incubators.   Baby stylists are fitting Elton’s baby with a really chic wig — he will look fabulous!